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<title>The Foolish Things We Do with Our Computers LG #89</title>
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<SMALL>...<I>making Linux just a little more fun!</I></SMALL>
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<BIG><BIG><STRONG><FONT COLOR="maroon">The Foolish Things We Do with Our Computers</FONT></STRONG></BIG></BIG>
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<STRONG>By <A HREF="../authors/orr.html">Mike ("Iron") Orr</A></STRONG>
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<H2>Out With It, Old Beast!</H2>
By <A HREF="mailto:lunatech3007@yahoo.com">Raj Shekhar</A>
<p>
While assembling my PC I used an unbranded CD- drive
to save some money. After three years of use, misuse
and mostly abuse, the CD- drive has started showing
signs that it has lived well beyond its estimated life
time.
<p>
We got first signs of its age when it refused to
eject. After much exercise with its eject button I was
able to get the CD out. However the drive did not take
this treatment kindly and next time whenever I pushed
the eject button, the drive would come out a little
and then retract back again. To use it, my brother and
I designed an ingenious brute fore algorithm. One of
us would push the button and the other one would grab
hold of the CD drive as soon as a bit of it came out
and then pull it out the rest of the way.
<p>
I am collecting money to buy a new CD drive. Moral of
the story: " Do not push anything beyond its age
limit"
<HR NOSHADE WIDTH="80%"> <!--*********************** -->
<H2>Cleaning your CD-ROMs the low tech way</h2>
By <A HREF="mailto:thomas_adam16@yahoo.com">Thomas Adam</A>,
the <em>LG</em> Weekend Mechanic
<blockquote><em>In a thread seen on the Answer Gang:</em>
<br><font color="navy">Yes --
you could try cleaning the lens. You can by
a CD-cleaning pack for about <20>5 (if you're in the UK).
</font>
</blockquote>
<blockquote> [Neil Youngman]
You could try polishing the CDs as well. I've solved
similar problems with
Pledge (furniture polish) and a duster.
<br>&nbsp;
<br>At your own risk of course.
</blockquote>
<p>
I've heard that putting Cd's in the freezer (-18C)
actually helps too!! No, I'm not joking
<IMG SRC="../gx/dennis/smily.gif" ALT=":-)"
height="24" width="20" align="middle">
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<h2>If it doesn't fit... make it fit!</h2>
By <a href="mailto:publisher@thegreenbayweb.com">Dale A. Raby</a>
<P>
Some time ago, I bought a Gateway 2000 equipped with a P5-90 processor for the princely sum of $35.00. Not surprisingly, it didn't work. I purchased a new i430VX motherboard and upgraded the CPU to a blazing fast 166 MHz Pentium. I scrounged enough memory to make the
beastie run... I believe it has 82 meg now.
<P>
Scrounging a CD ROM drive from another machine, a hard disk drive, floppy drive, modem and video card from other machines, I installed Mandrake Linux 7.0, hooked up a printer, a parallel port Iomega Zip 250 drive and went to work publishing my fledgling webzine.
<P>
Now, I needed my Zip drive for backups. Even Linux... at least of that era... wasn't foolproof. However, as careful as I tried to be, I kept knocking the Zip drive off of the top of the tower where I was keeping
it. Zip drives do not take well to being dropped. I tried mounting it on its side on the desk top, but this didn't work either... the third time I spilled iced-tea on it, I looked for another solution.
<P>
There was a spare bay for a drive to be mounted, but the parallel port model wasn't set up for that. It would fit, and could sit on top of the CD ROM drive. The problem was the interface cables. There had to be two of them from the drive; one to the printer, and one to the computer's parallel port, both of them on the outside of the case. I tried every possible orifice to squeeze the ends of the cables to the outside world... but without success. They were just too big to fit through any of the usual places where one might connect an internally mounted peripheral.
<P>
I noticed a square metal plate on the back of the case secured by four screws. Upon removing the plate, I found a grate cut into the metal. I suppose it was for mounting an extra fan... like that would ever become necessary in those days! The opening would be big enough except for the grate.
<P>
No problem. Coming from the Get a Bigger Hammer school of computer repair, I had just the tool.
<P>
I went out into the garage, grabbed a heavy duty extension cord and my Milwaukee Sawzall. For those not familiar, with it, this tool is ordinarily used
to remove unwanted walls from buildings, cut openings into roofs, or saw through automobile frames and the like. It weighs in around twenty pounds and exudes masculinity from every angle. OK, so it was
overkill.
<P>
I put a metal cutting blade in it and made short work of the sheet metal grate. After vacuuming up all the metal filings and larger chunks of metal that had fallen into the machine, I ran my two interface cables and the power cord into the case and secured them to the Zip drive, looped one back and plugged it into the parallel port, ran the other to the printer, and I was off.
<P>
That machine still works... now with a 20 GB hard disk using a drive controller to bypass the BIOS limitations. It runs Mandrake Linux 8.0 these days, but has about reached the zenith of its upgradability. I am using it now as a database computer to catalog the books, DVDs and other collections in my house. It has served faithfully for some five years now.
<P>
The Zip drive? Still in its bay inside the machine with the cables running through the jagged hole in the back of the case.
<HR NOSHADE WIDTH="80%"> <!--*********************** -->
<h2>Sticky Mouse</h2>
By <a href="mailto:peter.seed@ccur.com">Peter Seed</a>
<p>
I once found a colleague with his mouse on its back, ball compartment open,
poking a tube of superglue into the inside. I naturally asked him what he
was doing.
<P>
"I'm gluing this washer/o-ring thingy back onto the roller - it has slipped
and my mouse only works intermittently".
<P>
I'd never seen such a washer/o-ring thingy, but sure enough, on each of the
rollers, at the point where the ball contacted them was a shiny black ring,
about a millimetre thick and two and a half wide, looking for all the world
like a tiny grommet or o-ring.
He was trying to glue the crud he'd picked up off his desk, polished to a
high sheen by constant movement.
<HR NOSHADE WIDTH="80%"> <!--*********************** -->
<H2>Washing the CPU, and some other dumb things...</h2>
By <a href="milan@e-html.eu.org">Mixitron M. Urosevic</a>
<P>
Here's a
wicked story about the AMD (en)Duron and its psychotic owner
<IMG SRC="../gx/dennis/smily.gif" ALT=":)"
height="24" width="20" align="middle">.
<P>
Some days ago, I oiled my system fans and, since 'I was there', I decided to
change the old silver grease on the cpu. I made a rather lame cleaning swoop
over the cpu removing most of the grease from the chip and spread it over all
those L-thingies on the cpu-board. Brilliant. I tried to clean the
grease with alcohol, without any success. My cpu was still internally
shortcircuited.
<P>
Well, so be it. I took the cpu out and headed for the bathroom. I was just
about to wet the detergent in order to rub the cpu with it when I remembered
how silver jewelry is cleaned - with toothpaste. Allright! I rubbed the cpu
wit the toothpaste (all the time paying attention not to damage the warranty
sticker that was on the bottom of the cpu
<IMG SRC="../gx/dennis/smily.gif" ALT=";]"
height="24" width="20" align="middle">)
and slowly washed it with lukewarm water. Perfect.
<P>
Then I saw that a part of the cpu, upper left corner of it (THE cpu - that
little chip) was missing. It had been broken - probably when I placed the
cooler on its place the last time (it did take more brute force than usual...
it involved a screwdriver and a long scratch over the mainboard made by it
when my hand slipped - oh yeah, the motherboard survived that - hail Abit :)
) - and now, it had fallen off.
<P>
Facing the unevitable, i dried the cpu with a dry towel (I *broke* it, what
else could possibly happen to it?) and put it back to its place. The power
goes on, the system goes up. All is well and operating. I'd love to see Intel
surviving that
<IMG SRC="../gx/dennis/smily.gif" ALT=";]"
height="24" width="20" align="middle">)
<P>
To end the story, let's just say that the cpu is both overclocked and
undervoltaged. Mainboard is also o-clocked, but that did require some extra
decivolts...
<P><em>OneRing - a simple frontend for Sauron</em>
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<P>&nbsp;
<P>
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<IMG ALT="picture" SRC="../../gx/2002/tagbio/iron.jpg" WIDTH="161" HEIGHT="200"
ALIGN="left" HSPACE="10" VSPACE="10">
<em>
Mike is the Editor of <I>Linux Gazette</I>. You can read what he has
to say on the Back Page of each issue. He has been a Linux enthusiast
since 1991 and a Debian user since 1995. He is SSC's web technical
coordinator, which means he gets to write a lot of Python scripts.
Non-computer interests include Ska and Oi! music and the international
language Esperanto. The nickname Iron was given to him in college--short for
Iron Orr, hahaha.
</em>
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<CENTER><SMALL><STRONG>
Copyright &copy; 2003, Mike ("Iron") Orr.
Copying license <A HREF="../copying.html">http://www.linuxgazette.com/copying.html</A><BR>
Published in Issue 89 of <i>Linux Gazette</i>, April 2003
</STRONG></SMALL></CENTER>
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