332 lines
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332 lines
13 KiB
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<TITLE>The Answer Guy 32:
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Resume Spam
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<!-- ORIGINAL SUBJECT:
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resume on AS/400
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<BODY BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#000000" LINK="#0000FF" VLINK="#A000A0"
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<H4>"Linux Gazette...<I>making Linux just a little more fun!</I>"
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<P> <hr> <P>
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<H1 align="center"><A NAME="answer">
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<img src="../gx/dennis/qbubble.gif" alt="" border="0" align="middle">
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<a href="./index.html">The Answer Guy</a>
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<img src="../gx/dennis/bbubble.gif" alt="" border="0" align="middle">
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</A></H1>
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<BR>
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<H4 align="center">By James T. Dennis,
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<a href="mailto:linux-questions-only@ssc.com">linux-questions-only@ssc.com</a>
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<BR>Starshine Technical Services, <A HREF="http://www.starshine.org/">http://www.starshine.org/</A>
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</H4>
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<p><hr><p>
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<H3><img src="../gx/dennis/qbub.gif" alt="(?)"
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width="50" height="28" align="left" border="0"
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>Resume Spam</H3>
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<p><strong>From Prblnd on 24 Aug 1998 </strong></p>
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<!-- begin body -->
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<p><strong>AnswerGuy
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</strong><//p>
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<p><strong>I'm just a LittleGuy, out-of-work..Looking for AS/400 platform
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and somebody said I should tell you!
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</strong><//p>
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<blockquote><img src="../gx/dennis/bbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(!)" border="0">Who?
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Your assertion that "somebody said" you should tell <EM>me</EM>
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sounds very suspicious. If it is true that "somebody" said
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you should tell <EM>me</EM> about your plight --- that person is
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either stupid or cruel. I'm not a hiring manager. I'm not
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a recruiter. I have nothing whatsoever to do with AS/400's
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(no slight intended, they sound like nice enough systems).
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</blockquote>
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<p><strong><img src="../gx/dennis/qbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(?)" border="0">Question: Can you assist me to find a new start?
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<br>Answer:</strong></p>
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<blockquote><img src="../gx/dennis/bbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(!)" border="0">I probably could. However, the fact that you
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blindly sent this to me without any evident research into who I
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am and what I do suggests that time spent on assisting
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you would be wasted.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>However, here's the assistance I will offer:
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>
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<dl><dt>Research:
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<dd>Don't waste your time or anyone else's
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by blindly spamming addresses out of the
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blue. Do your homework. Send messages to
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those who are looking for them and expecting
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them. Make it clear in your message how you
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selected them and why you hold an expectation
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that they have requested your message.
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<dt>Writing:
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<dd>You message's semantics are horrible. The spelling
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and punctuation are reasonable. However, the
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phrase "looking for AS/400 platform" doesn't make
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sense. I presume you are looking for work that is
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"related to the AS/400" or that "requires expertise
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with AS/400's." I understand the difficulties
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faced by people for whom English is not native;
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however, you want to find someone who is literate
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and fluent in English to help you edit your messages
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to potential employers.
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<dt>Tone:
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<dd>Desperation is repugnant to most well-balanced
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people. Are you really looking for a "new start?"
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I would suggest that you focus on just getting
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a new job. You don't want to throw suggestions
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about "other" problems into the faces of potential
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employers.
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<p>The phrase "a new start" is idiomatic to Americans
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and suggests such unsavory failures as incarceration/
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institutionalization, divorce, and/or drug treatment.
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These are the sorts of total failures that require
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someone to look for a "new start." Merely getting
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laid off or even fired is merely enough to look for
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a "new job."
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<p>Also it is generally useless to appeal to a potential
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employer's sympathies. If I were a hiring manager
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I don't care if you are a "LittleGuy" or a major
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political, philosophical or intellectual figure.
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<p>Hiring managers care if you can do the job they need
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for the price they are willing to pay. Given multiple
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applicants that meet their pre-requisites they are
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generally swayed by much more subjective criteria
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(such as whether you are related to them, whether
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you are previously aquainted, and whether they "like"
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you, etc).
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<p>So, you want to maintain a "positively neutral"
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(and "upbeat") tone in your dealings with
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potential employers.
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</dl>
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>With that in mind let's re-write your message to me:
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</blockquote>
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<p align="center">------------------------ Begin Rewrite ---------------------------
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</p>
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<blockquote>Dear Mr. Dennis,
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Sam Ockman told me that you have lots of contacts throughout
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the industry. When I mentioned to him that I'm looking for
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a new position (systems administration, preferably on AS/400)
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he suggested that I drop you a note.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>I've attached my resume. Please feel free to share it with
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any of your associates that might be interested. I'm in
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Sri Lanka, North Dakota --- but I'm happy to relocate.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Also, any suggestions you have would be deeply appreciated.
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I've looked through some of the sites that are listed in Yahoo!'s
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"Employment" sections. There are so many of those that I'm not
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sure where to start.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Thanks.
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</blockquote>
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<p align="center">------------------------ End Rewrite ---------------------------
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</p>
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<blockquote>Note: we use a real name here. We don't use an alias.
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You could have searched for "answerguy" on Yahoo! gives
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242 references and apparently 222 of them point to me.
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(I'm not the one on CAGTV --- <A HREF="http://www.linux-questions-only@ssc.com">http://www.linux-questions-only@ssc.com</A>, and
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I'm not the one from Square One Tech (<A HREF="http://www.squareonetech.com">http://www.squareonetech.com</A>)
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Nor am I listed on Global Online Electronic Services
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(<A HREF="http://www.goes.com">http://www.goes.com</A>)). My full name is published in every
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article.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>We start of by saying precisely who sent you to me, and why.
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If you were referred through some traffic on a newsgroup or
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mailing list --- say so!
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Next we state our purpose. Nothing fancy --- just ask as
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directly and simply as possible. If you expected that I would
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be hiring --- tell me why you thought so. In that case you'd
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also want to say way you think that you're a suitable candidate
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for the specific positions you think I might have open.
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For example:
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>
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<blockquote>... some participants on the comp.unix.security
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newsgroup suggested that you might have an opening
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for a new webmaster. I've been working in HTML for
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three years, and I'm experienced with the installation
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and configuration of a number of popular CGI packages
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(including several from Matt's script archive).
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>I'm particularly interested in working for your consulting
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firm because I want to learn more about Unix and Internet
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security and I've heard that you're widely respected in this
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field. ...
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</blockquote>
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>(note: this is all hypothetical --- Starshine Technical Services
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does do some security consulting --- but is not "widely" regarded
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in the field, yet).
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Lastly, when we ask for more general help we also give some
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idea of what we're already doing. We do this for two reasons
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--- first is allows are respondent to avoid redundant suggestions.
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More importantly, it shows that we are motivated and that we've
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done <EM>some</EM> homework.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>The point is that everything you say is relevant to the matter
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at hand. You cannot do that unless you do some research.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>Incidentally, people posing technical questions should
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take note of this advice. It applies as much for an
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"application for technical support" as it does for any
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other.
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</blockquote>
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<blockquote>At this point I get enough mail for the "Answer Guy" that
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I don't wonder where people heard of me (when they're
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talking about Linux). However, it would be nice if I
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knew a bit more about where some of these questions came
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from. If someone at a users group meeting says: "You should
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send mail to that guy from the Linux Gazette" --- I'd like
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to hear about which UG it was.
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</blockquote>
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<p><strong><img src="../gx/dennis/qbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(?)" border="0">Question: WILL you assist me in finding the
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new career job?
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<br>Answer...
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</strong></p>
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<blockquote><img src="../gx/dennis/bbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(!)" border="0">No.</blockquote>
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<p><strong><img src="../gx/dennis/qbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(?)" border="0">okay, two questions, only one right answer...
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thanks for your time....
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</strong><p>
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<p><strong>resume attached............................
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</strong><p>
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<blockquote><img src="../gx/dennis/bbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(!)" border="0">... (apparently in .DOC format) and deleted
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without a glance.
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</blockquote>
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<!-- end body -->
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<p><hr width="40%" align="center"></p>
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<!-- ...................... -->
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<H3><img src="../gx/dennis/qbub.gif" alt="(?)"
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width="50" height="28" align="left" border="0"
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>More on Resume Spam</H3>
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<p><strong>From Prblnd on 24 Aug 1998 </strong></p>
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<!-- begin body -->
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<p><strong>you made me laugh thru your entire response ..
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</strong></p>
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<p><strong>thank you -
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</strong></p>
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<p><strong>Paul
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</strong></p>
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<blockquote><img src="../gx/dennis/bbub.gif" height="28" width="50"
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alt="(!)" border="0">Glad I could help!</blockquote>
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<!-- end body -->
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<!--startcut ======================================================= -->
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<P> <hr> <P>
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<H5 align="center"><a href="http://www.linuxgazette.com/copying.html"
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>Copyright ©</a> 1998, James T. Dennis <BR>
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Published in <I>Linux Gazette</I> Issue 32 September 1998</H5>
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<P> <hr> <P>
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<table width="98%"><tr valign="center" align="center">
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<td rowspan="3"><A HREF="./lg_answer32.html"><IMG
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SRC="../gx/dennis/answernew.gif"
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ALT="[ Answer Guy Index ]"></A></td>
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<td><A HREF="tag_phreak.html">phreak</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_abandon.html">abandon</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_javaterm.html">javaterm</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_BBS.html">BBS</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_flaws.html">flaws</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_doslinux.html">doslinux</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_resume.html">resume</A>
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</tr><tr valign="center" align="center">
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<td><A HREF="tag_softwindows.html">softwindows</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_convert.html">convert</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_apache.html">apache</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_emulate.html">emulate</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_database.html">database</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_distrib.html">distrib</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_proxy.html">proxy</A>
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</tr><tr valign="center" align="center">
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<td><A HREF="tag_disable.html">disable</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_DVI.html">DVI</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_superblock.html">superblock</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_serial.html">serial</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_permission.html">permission</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_detach.html">detach</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_cdr.html">cdr</A>
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</tr><tr valign="center" align="center">
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<td><A HREF="tag_rs422.html">rs422</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_modem.html">modem</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_notfound.html">notfound</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_tuning.html">tuning</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_libc5.html">libc5</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_startup.html">startup</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_clock.html">clock</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_ping.html">ping</A>
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</tr><tr valign="center" align="center">
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<td><A HREF="tag_accounts.html">accounts</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_lilo.html">lilo</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_NDS.html">NDS</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_95slow.html">95slow</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_nonlinux.html">nonlinux</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_progenv.html">progenv</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_cluster.html">cluster</A>
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<td><A HREF="tag_ftpd.html">ftpd</A>
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</tr></table>
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